The Test …
The Test of Time, only the Brave withstand
It is your success to make you jolly
It is up to you to realize your folly
The test is hard, it ain’t easy
Some stains wash away, while some are greasy
Some learnings make you strong and bearing
Some learnings overpower you, they are overwhelming
You may not realize what the test has to offer
you think you are here, to live and prosper
The living should be good, not everyone may be prosperous
Some reasons seem valid, while some are just preposterous
You meet many people, you touch many lives
A breeze passes away, there are many beehives
The nectar is sweet, there is Hatred and Love
All things are just events, planned from Above !
Life moves on, you try to make a difference
Hours pass by, is there even the slightest reference ?
You smile many smiles, some real some fake
Just a curl of the lips, how long does it take
How many of those smiles, reach deep within ?
How many are by your side, through thick and thin ?
The questions are intriguing, something to ponder
Something to dig deeper, something to wonder
That is what the test puts forth
For you to be brave, to realize your worth
Success and Failure are Life’s part and parcel
Live a Content Life, Live Well O Mortal !
Do we really grow up … ever …
Grow up … get on with life … ab toh bade bann jaao … behave like a grown up … and many many more such phrases that we keep hearing in our day to day life and even quote them as if we ourselves have outgrown our past self … but do we really grow up, ever ?
I feel, I for one, haven’t grown up … at all maybe …
Things happen which just shake you to the core and you are never the same again … those thinking-altering things stay with you … the brain takes note of the surroundings, dictates your behavior and advances to its further learning … it doesn’t seem to care what effect that event has had on your heart and your personality as a whole … it seems to be just busy in its own calculations.
The persona changes however … you are no longer the same kid enjoying the blissful ignorance … you change to a responsible person suppressing your emotions and trying to act as if you are in control of the situation and are ready to wipe others’ tears … little do you realize that it is not you who is in control of the situation … it is the situation which has captivated you and your brain which is dictating the terms here. You decide that you will take this happening in your experience and move on … get over the situation thinking about the wonders of the healing power of time. But does time really have a healing power … can you really forget everything ? even if it repeats over and over again so much so that it has become a norm as against an exception ? Is your brain conditioned enough to breeze you through the most trying of times and the hardest of conditions ? Does the mighty Time heal everything, even your deepest wounds or the scar remains ?
And then some day when the heart decides to take its revenge, it just decapitates the “thinking” brain and acts as per its own sweet will. The visible effects of this change are mood swings, irrational thoughts, depression. These emotions fill you up and at times overflow and affect the people whom you are really close to. They may or may not like it, you may or may not like this public display of emotions, but you really seem to have no control over it. Childish as it may reflect in hindsight … the naive you accept that childish behavior as part of your growing up process and think that you’ve become more wiser on account of your experiences.
But, are they really steps of your learning curve ? or they are just experiences which expose the immature child within you ? I am still yearning for an answer, wondering if I’ll ever be enlightened with it …
Everyone seems to be hiding all their agonies behind a mask that he puts up for the world. Only the closest ones know what all is going unsaid and tormenting the heart behind the smiling face and happy-looking spirit. I strongly believe that we should try to be nice to everyone around us and not unnecessarily speak harsh words which might hurt them and further add on to their grief. You never know what the other person is hiding and putting up a cheerful front every single day. I know its easier said than done, but you got to teach your child to behave, in your feeble attempt to make it “grow up” … isn’t it ?
Mood Swings …
Yes … I am having them … again !!!
All of a sudden, since today afternoon, I am aware that I am not my usual self. I am feeling irritated, overwhelmed, bored, slightly angry and what not and I am looking for a corner which will have the calming, soothing effect on me. Trust me when I write this that I realize now that my mood swing started last night when I was surfing the internet. I didn’t realize that it was a mood-swing-onset and unknowingly named my favorite songs’ playlist – Soothing. Thinking back now, methinks I couldn’t have done anything even if I had realized that what I was having last night was a mood swing.
One thing I have noticed about these mood swings is that they kinda unnerve you, rock your poise, more often than not leave you sleeping more than usual and still feeling exhausted and many a times emotionally drained out and you really have to pull yourself up and get ready to start the new cycle of your so-called routine. And if you are lucky, your mood swing will happen on a weekend so that you get two full days to be at your worst and get over it ( assuming you are left alone by the time the second day of the weekend gets over ).
Today, I wonder what the mood swing has in its mind that it is making me write this post. I feel like ( or it makes me feel like ) jotting down my thoughts as they come to my mind about these mood swings. So, here I am, trying to do justice ( and get rid of my current swing-cycle ). Thinking about past such cycles, don’t know why … but when I have them, though I get irritated, I feel that if anything gives you a ( not so welcome ) break from your monotonous routine, it is these mood swings !
What causes them, trust me I have the faintest idea. My brain tells me that there could be many reasons for it – something happening the way you want it to happen, something not happening the way you want it to happen, something bothering you, something playing games on your mind, your body not or overly responding to the daily toll you take on it, people bothering you, your thoughts affecting your well-being, you are irritated on someone or by something, you want to do something but situation is tying your hands, … i can go on and on with my mind’s ramblings, but then … rationale tells you that if you know that these are the probable reasons for these mood swings ( as you call them ) then take guard and don’t let these reasons affect you or lead you into having these mood swings … and here is where my thought process chips in to say that “See – this is precisely why I told you that it is the factor that gives ‘human’ness to your boring life routine … the sheer unpredictability and the logic-defying nature of these mood swings. You know what might cause it to you, you know you can avoid it but you helplessly can’t do anything about it. The only option available is to bear them, make others around you ( who unfortunately fell in the spread of area around you when you are having your mood swings ) bear them and consequently make them bear you, be irritable and irritating or in your close shell avoiding others – which will again become irritating for others as they might feel you are being snobbish – and shutting off, ponder over the thoughts which come into your mind ( which many a times are just trash thoughts, I mean, no value add to anything or anyone ), try and pray mighty hard to get over your “swing” period and then get back on track to being your normal monotonous self.
Okay, I now feel like ending this post. I know it is an abrupt ending but hey, I have to obey my controller’s orders. Wonder if the root cause ( whatever it is ) behind my current cycle of mood swing will bestow its Grace upon me and leave me for writing so much about it … ( hope I didn’t use any harsh words for it to come looking for me again ).
Amen !
Stupefied …
… that’s how I felt today … as if someone had cast a spell on me, I was amazed, dazed, astounded, bewildered … basically, I was at a loss … just like I am at a loss of words to express the degree by which my mind was blown away …
and you would know that this is no exaggeration when I tell you the occasion … I watched Inception and Memento …
See, I knew you would understand when I told you the cause …
What movies … both of them … amazing … brilliant … masterpieces …
I have to be frank here and admit the not-so-blissful ignorance I was under up till now … I mean, seriously … to be in this world and be ignorant about Inception and Memento … its an insult to Christopher Nolan’s Genius … trust me …
Yes, I know I am putting in a tad bit too many “…” in the post, but that’s just another way to indicate the level of my stupefiedness … words are not coming as fluently as they otherwise do. Thinking of something and executing it are different and difficult tasks and executing it in such a gripping, mind-boggling, i would dare say sinisterly and unnervingly perfect manner … it neither leaves you wanting for more, nor leaves you overly satisfied … its like that perfect state of satisfaction … The ULTIMATE sense of being (un)knowingly blown away !!!
I would love to go on and on and on and on with my broken thoughts … but here’s something for starters from one of my friends who is a fanatical admirer of Christopher Nolan … he types and I quote …
“An artist is the person who – given a budget of only $5m, no superstars, no background score, a good story – can create a master piece like Memento … and as fascinating as it may sound, an artist is also the person who – given everything from budget to great actors to great composers – can give you movies that gross $830m ( Inception ) and $1b ( Dark Knight ) … Calling them just movies itself sounds like an insult to what looks like art making process by the likes of Da Vinci … and of course the artist behind the camera is none other than Christopher Nolan.”
Anyone who has seen and understood the depth of Memento and Inception and Dark Knight will agree … these are really works of art … masterpieces miles ahead of their times … no, actually they are eternal masterpieces … timeless and ageless classics appealing to people regardless of their age, gender, political views, anything for that matter because I feel they appeal to your Intellect. They provoke your grey cells, make you shake your brain’s thinking part and go with the flow all guards down … they compel you to see the beautiful strokes through the Artist’s eyes … they take control of your senses and leave you in a free-fall to enjoy and be one with the awesomeness that is being unfolded.
This is probably the first post that I will HAVE to revisit and complete … I am completely baffled and will really really have to get back to this one … to make notes about the two Genius artworks which put me in a dreamy state and I would have to rattle out the sense for being able to do justice to write some details about these two …
Until then … I salute the genius that is Christopher Nolan.
Recent Comments